…………………On the way to a 3 hours drive to her grandparents city,
she again was swayed away by nostalgia.
Every scene,every tree,
every smell,the yellow flowers,
the river, the lush grass,
reminded her of her so perfect childhood
Of the time, she too lived carefree.
It was a million dollar moment.
She always always loved being drowned in it,
for it was yet another moment of hope,
tranquility and blessing.
It made her embarrassed too,
for there was a continuous phase of her life,
when she wanted to run far away,
from all the noise,
from all the reality,
from all the dejection.
But,how could she run away from reality??
The world was real and so was she!!
She could never have escaped the tight grip of those ropes,
holding her in this land of people who have inevitable deaths,
until she left the world too….
She gave that up,
the mere idea of trying to escape
now scared the hell out of her.
She couldn’t forgive herself for being so un-thankful in that phase,
when there existed a mesmerizing,
a greater peaceful part of life.
For her, running away and giving up
was what cowards did,
and she hated that.
Yes. So she was doing
what she thought wasn’t moving forward ,
but, wasn’t running away either
but was everything she could do then,
which was taking all her energy away
that is hanging in there